Confessions of an Unintentional Domestic Goddess

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That was original…

Ok, this is not Domestic Goddess kind of stuff, but it’s just so damned funny, I had to share.

I have two children whom I love more than anything else on this planet.  They are the most precious gifts I have ever had the privilege of receiving.  They are exactly one week shy of being three years apart.  They are best friends one minute and mortal enemies the next.  Last year we bought our son a double bed and sometimes on weekends they like to have ‘sleepovers’ and camp together in his bed.  It’s fun for them, kind of like a mini-vacation.

So tonite I tell them if they wanna do a sleepover, I”m cool with it.  As long as I don’t hear a lot of racket coming from them and they actually go to sleep.  Fat chance.  I hear some noise, and then I hear my daughter start crying and calling me.  I go  upstairs to see what the commotion is and she’s upset because my boy has called her a name.  What name did he call her? Nothing that I’ve ever heard, I think it’s his own original creation.

“Mom, Spencer called me a….(sniff sniff) he called me a ….(more sniffing for theatrical/drama purposes) butt crack.’

“You called her a what??”

‘But mom she was…”

“It doesn’t matter what she was doing.  I never want to hear that come from either one of you.  If I do, you will be getting your mouth washed out with soap.  Am I clear?”

“yes, ma’am.’

Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a straight face when you’re scolding someone for doing something,  but it’s so freaking funny and you don’t want them to see that, because it’s encouraging the behavior?  Yeah, it’s really tough, hence a post about name calling on a domestic blog.

A little peek into my life.  I promptly removed my daughter back to her own bed and came downstairs to a lovely, wonderful waiting glass of Cabernet. Aaah.  That’s better.

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